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Lady Lynda and Seymour Toze check out adopting a dog.

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Seymour Toze and Lady Lynda think about checking  various animal shelters to adopt a dog.

.Seymour retrieves a book from their den.    Its “Canineopedia” It lists over four hundred canines.  It includes every American Kennel Club and United Kennel club and dogs not included in any kennel club except for the international  “Federation Cynological International” the granddaddy of  nearly  every kennel club in the world.

The couple peruse the text for how to care for their new family member. . ..  They know most likely the dog will be a lovable mutt.   They insist on a housetrained canine..    With these factors in mind  they read the care for a dog section first. Starting  ith  taking your dog home.   The first part they discover is how to  puppy proof your place..  One thing this is making  certain  there are no toxic house plants. , no harmful  chocolate, no loose wires, no objects such as vases, bowls, lamps, cups or any other small items the dog could trip over. .  The next chapter was on dog beds, collars,  leashes.  Exercising one’s pet  The couple skipped the house training  since they insisted they would only adopt a dog that was house broken.. They skimmed the grooming section too.  They’d groom it themselves.

They insisted on short haired so it’d be once a week grooming with a simple dog brush. . Smart enough to learn basic commands like  come,  retrieve , stay,  paw, down,  beg   They weren’t looking for a circus dog  Specifically there were seeking a dog that needed max a thirty minute walk.  Their preference size wise was for a dog that was between thirteen and sixteen inches in height and proportionate in weight.   With these factors in mind they look up various breeds in their printed material and in dog sites on the net.  They realize too it was much more likely there would mainly be loveable mutts at the local shelters.

The  Tozes felt felt excited  to check the nearby pet shelters.  That is ones that were no more than ten miles from their home in Haverford PA. They go to a popular general search engine.  Lady Lynda types in the search bar finding a dog in a shelter or   rescue no more than ten miles miles from their zip code.  Now the journey would  commence.  They were really excited to begin their journey toward a canine addition to their home.


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Lady Lynda dreamily recalled theirtheir College Days

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Lady Lynda settled in for a good night’s sleep snuggling up to her paramour hubby Seymour. Both of them serenely enjoying the comfort of their old fashion four poster bed.  It was pretty much like those wholesome family scenes of mom and dad in those fifties movies.  Lady Lynda heard her husband snore and thought his snores were the sweetest sounds since Bing Crosby singing “White Christmas”  She thought of how dear he    her.made her feel so happy.  With that  blissful  mood she drifted off to 

Suddenly Lady  Lynda felt terrifically hot.  So much so she immediately wanted to rip off her ankle length carnation pink flannel nightgown.  The woman tugged at her sleepwear as if she was desperate to get it  off her.  She wondered if the thermostat temperature suddenly rose.  Toze’s wife looked over to check on her husband.  He was serenely sleeping..   Mrs Lady Lynda May Huffenfetter Toze wondered completely dismayed.  Was she imagining the chill?   The woman climbed  out of bed and tiptoed quietly to the picture window to see about what she could find out.. Lady Lynda smiled and sighed  feel ng much relieved by the invigorating  air  cooling her from head to her fleshy chubby toes.   She enjoyed the cool air as it refreshed her frame making her feel as cool as a pleasant refreshing Shirley Temple.

“Summe rBreeze’. sung  Seals and Croft wafted through Lady Lynda’s mind.    Lady Lynda thought back to her dormitory days at the sexually segregated University, Benjamin Franklin University,  that Seymour and her were pupils at  In doing so her pupils dilated recalling fond memories.  It was there she remembered how they wetr so close yet a safe distance to keep  their virginity before marriage.   She smiled as she recalled her time there.

The woman thoughtfully reflected how conflicted she was in keeping her distance from Toze yet wanting so achingly  to be close to him.   At least  her memories of him going through the same thing she recalled encouaraged her.  there was Seymour going through chastity with her  A testament to pride and togetherness and proper morality. .  Lady Lynda reminesces about their time in  college.  She reminesced how the separate dorms made it much easier to stay chaste.  The temptation wasn’t so much as opposed   to lving  in mixed  dorms.  The woman sighed as she looked back on their time at BFU. Lady Lynda reminded herself of her strict Orthodox Jewish upbringing and how that helped her stay pure until her marriage to Seymour.

The now Mrs Toze thought back on how she believed that absence truly does make the heart  yearn. The reflection made her eyes tear up with a strong sense of sentiment..    Keeping that sentiment in mind  the  woman  told herself even though it was very hard for her,  that in the end it was worth it to be saved  for  Seymour.  That sentiment made her warmly smiled. Then the woman walked back toward the bedroom.  Seeing her husband Seymour Toze peacefully asleep made her joyful. . It  worked out perfectly with her and Seymour snuggling together throughout the evening.  Lady Lynda knew their lifestyle wasn’t for everyone but what lifestyle is she mused.   She only knew she was glad she stood up for her beliefs and tomorrow would be a new day lesson in internet marketing for newbies





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Boardwalk Wanderlust

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‘Wooden boards of the boardwalk.
Lady Lynda and her beau Seymour delight in a splash filled dip in the motel refreshing indoor pool. Next they dry off. Change into their casual walking clothes and head on over to the boards.

White House SUbs. Lady Lynda and Seymour Toze casually walk the boardwalk. They travel a couple blocks and then they spot “Whitehouse Subs” Lets go to the White House.” I’m not in the mood to get political” griped Seymour’s paramour . “I meant WhiteHouse SUbs. Its a mere hop, skip and a jump from us. This eatery brings back such fond memories of when your dad use to treat us when we first started dating. I found out decades later its the oldest non chain sub shop in Atlantic City. Started soon after ww2 ended and its been serving subs or hoagies what you like to call those delicious distinctively shaped sandwiches ever since. His wife hearing shaped blushed when she thought of how she was now not so pleasantly plump. “I suppose sub is short for submarine, referring to the shape of the sandwich.”
Maybe so commented her husband . I know I’m in the shape to try one. They enter the restaurant and are immediately struck by the strong pungent delicious odors of the food. They breath in the smells as if it was life giving oxygen. “Now this is the kind of aromatherapy I like” exclaimed Seymour. “I like the pungency of this place too.” replied Lady Lynda, Seeing these subs bring memories of your dad treating us here rush through my mind like a quite pleasant breeze. That was so charming of your father to treat us for lunch here. “Yes it certainly was Mrs Lady Lynda Toze. I remember that was the first way my dad showed that he believed in our relationship. He’s been going to this place for decades.” “He picked a tasty place” commented Toze’s wife.

The twosome walk up to the counter. Seymour reminded this was the eatery his father would treat them him and Lady Lynda were first dating. His wife smiled warmly as she recalled the many times Mr. Toze would treat his son and her to mouth watering delicious world famous hoagies. The two were brimming with fond memories. The sandwiches were mouth watering delicious.

Next the twosome went to “Walts Salt Water Taffy for a quick snack . They peruse their many choices of flavors. Lady Lynda notices a sign near the front window. She squints her eyes as she tries to read the fine print The woman immediately discovers its the history of the salt water taffy. She reads that its traditionally thought circa 1900 a certain Mr. David Bradley was upset to find his taffy soaked with seawater. He for some forsaken reason sold the candy. Salt Water Taffy was born. The perusing brings back fond memories of going to the shore as teenagers. Inside the salt water taffy store. “Hey look Seymour we are eating an historical snack. “Nothing like putting something in your tummy with that background” quipped Toze. Lets go the cashier and order some salt water taffy. I recall how as a little boy I loved my mom treating me with “Walt’s Salt Water Taffy” She would treat me for being such a good, obedient son.

They saunter on over to where you pick your flavors. When the got there they soon discovered there were so many ones to choose from. They saw that there was a myriad number of fruit, spice, chocolate ones. The dazzling display of plethora of taste overwhelmed them. Other customers rushed over to help the couple who fainted. A few minutes later the Tozes got back on their feet. Mr. Seymour Tozes choice was the spicy chiplotle creme. Mrs Lady Lynda preferred the honey pumpkin spice.

Cheap but fun games with equally inexpensive but entertaining prizes. Fun time for the couple as they try their hand at skee ball to win oversized stuffed teddy bears and other stuffed animals. “This is much smarter than losing money gambling. True one could be a winner but much more likely you’ll lose copious sums of money. Here we can earn cute little stuffed animals. Lady Lynda shrugged as she listened to Seymour explain the wise decision of playing the boardwalk games. “Besides as they say it is the thought that counts. Right Sweetyuggums.” Seymour said to his wife. She smiled wanly at the sentiment.

They walk on until they reach the “Ripley’s Believe it or not museum” The immediately notice the house that was to built as if it were up side down. The two marvel at its clever construction. Then moving forward they enter the museum and immediately gape at the incredible exhibits. These included a huge earth globe. A statue of a Chinese man with two pupils and irises. World’s largest guitar. Lady Lynda with bittersweet memories her father playing guitar in a seedy bar band to help support her family. She gasped as she imagined her daddy carrying that giant instrument. As she imagined that rediculous image she giggled and guffawed. Seymour meanwhile gently tapped his wife on the shoulder to get her to notice him. His spouse immediately turned ar around and look quite puzzled. “What is it dear. Are you okay.” i’m fine” he replied . Lets not stay here when there is so much more to explore. “Hey that rhymes” quipped Lady Lynda. “So much for poems. Let’s move!! The two walk into the “Odditorium” They gawk at the numerous shrunken heads and shudder at the notion they were heads of real people. The twosome’s eyes gape wide when they visit the word’s smallest passenger car . The two are fascinated by the life size statue of the world’s tallest man ever.   Robert Wadlow at just over nine feet tall. Seymour joked how saying some man is shorter than Robert Wadlow sure wasn’t saying much. Lady Lynda chuckled at his that’s not saying much joke.” “Oh Seymour my love for makes me feel warm and tender and that is saying very much. “Likewise Lady Lynda” her mate fondly responded as they warmly embrace. The couple walks off to a casino nearby.

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AC Trip

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Seymour Toze and Lady Lynda peruse the internet travel sites for the cheapest deal for their vacation motel.  They search several money saving web sites for motels   They carefully scrutinize several choices and decide on the Showbiz hotel in Atlantic City.    They like  that the place includes an olympic  sized  pool on the highest floor, the 20th floor.   The couple are pleased the perks were  air conditioning,   short walk to the shore,   private balcony,  a mini refrigerator,   a safe for their valuables,  maid service ,   a wide screen television,  a view of the ocean, rooms for non smokers and especially queen size bed   The twosome hugged each with glee when they discovered everything  including breakfast was for less then seventy dollars.

“Oh wow it sounds lovely.  So glad there’s air conditioning.  It can get quite humid in the summertime in that shore town.  A cozy beach.  What do they mean?  inquired Lady Lynda quite intrigued.  Seymour replied I don’t now but I’d sure like to find out.  I suppose we can ask  about that when we dial the motel.  That’s easy enough to find  out  I know we’ll both treasure our visit to the private balcony.

Lady Lynda and her mate enter the lobby of the Showbiz hotel for the staff to check their bags.   They are exhausted and ready for a good night sleep on the firm mattresses on their queen sized bed.  They both hug each and plop into bed.  They embrace each other with utter joy feeling crazy in love.     They are fully dressed … far.    ” We really were lucky finding such a terrific bargain”  exclaimed Seymour.   “Yes that’s one good thing about the reopening of the US from the lockdown.   I  believe with my heart the states should do their utmost to do it safely.   Including here.  But oh do I love this fabulous bargain.   Ordinarily this motel would cost close to one hundred dollars and we get it for sixty nine dollars.  I’m so glad we chose AC.  Now when we wake up tomorrow we’ll be eating the breakfasts I put in the fridge.   Plus the sugar free sweet tea.  Then its heading on out to the “Ripley’s Believe it or not” Museum.    Next we’ll tour “Lucy the Elephant hotel”  enthused Toze.. Oh that would so entertaining Seymour commented.  Oh I’m looking forward to tomorow.

The next day the twosome explores what adventures they’ll experience on the famous boardwalk.


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Lady Lynda and Seymour Toze plan a Rendevou together

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Some time in the foreseeable future.
Lady Lynda and her sweetums plan for a well deserved and much needed vacation now that the coronavirus restrictions eased up enough.  The days swiftly go by as they count the days to their respite as they combat cabin fever. The two choices are narrowed down to Bridgeport CT and Atlantic City NJ. Lady Lynda beams as she tells her mate Bridgeport is her mother’s birthplace and its the home of the P.T. Barnum museum. She excitedly continues to explain the museum reminds her of her dear freaks. “Can you imagine the tragedy of suffering from a deviated septum? Oh the horror!!!  Or being from Texas with an accept where nobody can make out what you’re saying? Oh the tragic case of being tone deaf and not realizing it ” she exclaimed wearily wiping her brow.

“Seymour mon amore.  Oh how clever of me.   My little bonmot  Seymour my amore and it rhyme.   Mr Toze smiled wanly. as he pensively listened to his wife. “Oh Lady Lynda my paramour,  my amore.  His wife grinned happily.  Seymour replied  I feel I’m between two major worlds.  I understand you choosing Bridgeport. I’m leaning toward Atlantic City NJ. There’s the beach, the delightful water I love being wet especially with the waves splashing upon my hot body. I’m sure you like me listen intently to what Dr. Anthony Fauci says and Dr. Birx too. Oh I love her colorful scarves. I am so glad they gave the go ahead. Heaven forbid we spread the virus to others.  I know you and I will wear our masks and social distance.,..except for each other when we’re out.     I feel torn.  “I know the feeling Lady Lynda so do I replied Seymour Toze.

The two turn on the local news to  eagerly  check out the latest COVID-19 news. They immediately notice every state is in the yellow stage. Their choices are narrowed down to Bridgeport CT and Atlantic City NJ. Seymour’s wife chose Bridgeport CT. Lady Lynda gushes with excitement as mentioned There in Bridgeport you can see a lifesize statue of Charles Stratton. Much better knownfor his stage name Tom Thumb. “Oh Lady Lynda Mr Barnum was a fraud. His earliest exhibit was an old shriveled black woman who he claimed was Pres. George Washington’s babysitter. How can you praise such a scalywag. Besides my pick Atlantic City features a branch of “Ripley’s Believe it not Museum” It even features a life size statue of the world’s tallest man “Robert Wadlow” at a fraction of an inch under nine feet tall. There’s lots to do too. he enthused. “What is there to do in Bridgeport CT except for the PT Barnum museum. A sightseeing site of a major huckster Seymour sneered. Lady Lynda delicately, ever so properly wiped a single tear that wafted from her marble blue eye. “How dare you Seymour Bridgeport happens to be the birthplace of my dear sweet mother.” Seymour Toze tensed as he was taken by surprise. “Oh dearest dear I by no means meant to insult your female parent. My point is there’s so much more to in AC. There’s lots to do besides that immoral pastime gambling. There of course is the beach. We can collect seashells. We can put our toesies in the ocean water” “Oh what a connumdrum” sighed Lady Lynda. Mother’s hometown, PT Barnum vs AC boardwalk, Ripley’s the Beach. The beach did seem tempting. “Now that you mentioned the ocean and beach Atlantic City NJ does sound rather delightful. AC for us.

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Networking at home.

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Topics, messager,  Zoom, other online remote meeting apps. Messenger is an app you can download from your playstore on your smartphone.  I assume being business executives you own a smart phone and computerw here you can get on the internet.  Plus your ISP  is a cable one.   I mention this because messenger is you can get to Zoom on the internet.   You can reach messenger on your smart phone and the net.

Signing up for Zoom.  Its basic information, of course your name email. You pick a username and password.   There must be one capitol letter,  rest small letters and one number and symbol.   Then once you get that done you’ll receive a confirmation in your email.  Its pretty much the standard stuff .One of the  most popular topics on the net is how to become a member of Zoom.  Zoom is in these days.   In like Flynn but I suppose you young folks don’t get that reference.   Your grandparents sure would.  I’m too much of a lady to want to elaborate. Lets just say use your imagination,

These are two major applications that make it possible to network while staying home.   This is crucially important since you don’t want to be too near other people.    These days its perfectly fine to be antisocially   At least that is physically.   Hopefully if enough people stay inside and social distance when out for necessities this coronavirus thing will be gone with the wind.  Oh I’m giving my age away    Not true I saw it on TV.   But I digress.  At least there are effective ways to network at your domicile where you live.


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Lady Lynda and Her Sole mate Seymour Toze life changes dramatically in the Days of Coronavirus

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Lady Lynda is wearing her full length pink and red flannel nightgown.   Seymour wears his teddybear  cotton pajamas.   They lay next to each other on their old fashion four poster bed.  The two snuggle up together affectionately     The two are enjoying their moments just before retiring for the night.   Yet  as they enjoy their moments together they feel an air of heaviness realizinf  the seriousness of the situation.   There is no escaping the matter.of COVID-19

At keast we git each oither, ” quipped Lady Lynda’s spouse. ”  I feel the same way” exclaimed Seymour.    Our place is quite cozy for the two of us.   Thank goodness there’s our landline and cell phone.”  Plus our internet ” commented Lady Lynda    Still I miss the sunshine.  Or  the outdoors.   “Yes it is rather restricting but we need to   put on our stiff upper lips so we flatten the curve for this terrible virus.   I do miss doing my pedicures.   .  The   I really miss giving so much pleasure to my middle aged , most grateful lady customers with their sore tired feet.   I feel I was so uplifting to them.   Those were the days.]

”   Tomorrow I’ll go on unemployment and get what I’m due.   “I hope its enough Lady Lynda exclaimed . “If my due isn’t enough we’ll make do.  ”   Its so hard to do that especially with so many creeps hoarding.   Its one thing to stock up but fifty rolls of paper products indeed”  remarked Toze’s wife.  “We can’t stop everyone we can only do the best we can with what we got.”   Let’s buckle down and get through this.  We can’t  ignore this and wish it would disappear . We need to what we can to lessen the curve.”

“That begs the question my dear what is the best way to get through this coronavirus crisis ”    queried Seymour.    Lady Lynda replied “We need to be diligent in our social distancing.  That means not to leave where you live unless totally necessary   If you go out stay as much as possible six feet away from other people.   I recommend wearing a surgical mask or somehow covering up your nose and mouth. Making your own and freeing professional health care masks for health workers on the frontline of this horrible scourge.   Cough into your elbow.  Wash your hands for at minimum twenty seconds.  I suggest singing to yourself “Row row row your boat” twice. Or “Happy Birthday” two times.   “Hey what ever makes your toes tap”  quipped Seymour.




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Lady Lynda and Seymour Toze reflect on their disasterious soire

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Lady Lynda  then sat down on one of the four  cushioned patio chairs that surrounded  the quaint carnation pink and glass lounging table.  She put the cup of Shirley Temple  to her lips..  Just then Seymour entered from the recroom and joined her.  In his hand was a jug of chocolate milk.  He smiled like a little boy with his ultimate favorite treat. ”  Cheers darling.  What could be sweeter than being here.  You with your delightful Shirley Temple and me with my jug of chocolate milk.   The weather is so pleasant..    Here we are in our veranda with each other..  Its a lovely time of day with the sun gently settling in the west.  And us with our small pleasures.”

“I wish I knew what laid ahead for us. That soiree was a disaster with three people getting so seriously sick.  I with my etiquette talks and you with the “Into Leather Shoe Store and your pedicures ”

“Ah yes I love doing my pedi cures.”  exclaimed Seymour with glee emphasizing cures.  I just got an idea my dearest.  Why not start a tour on safe cooking?

“What??!!! After what we went through!!! exclaimed Lady Lynda.

“That is exactly why”her husband retorted.  That way we can show the folks we learned from our terrible mistakes and how they can prevent such errors too.  I see by that look on  your face, your disgusted look, your scrunched up nose.   I know I’m getting off topic but your button nose is so darn cute to me.”

His wife blushed and meekly thanked him for the compliment.

Before she could say one more word Seymour convinced her that an ounce of prevention was a pound of cure.   Others could learn from their errors what to watch for.  What to do.”

“I’m all in” Lady Lynda excitedly responded.




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Lady Lynda’s web site complaints

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Lady Lynda stands up on stage.  The woman quickly surveys her clients in the lecture hall.   She observes their demeanor, their body language and their eagerness to hear her talk this evening.

Encouraged by their eager enthusiasm Mrs Toze starts her topic on her personal complaints concerning biz web sites with the basics.   “Its a given that nobody likes scams, spams ,  questionable taste web sites and especially child porn.

Mrs Seymour Toze then tells the mostly middle aged men and middle aged woman she would talk about other complaints.

Ist complaint.  Time sensitive sales pitches.

I can not tolerate time sensitive sales pitches and neither should you.   Any time you’re dealing with someone trying to sell any kind of offer you should never be forced to given a deadline to decide.   Its your money you should be able to consider exactly how you want to spend your hard earned cash. I get really suspicious every time I see a business time sensitive offer on the net. What’s the hurry? Why is who is ever behind the pitch rushing me. Are they so worried that if I spend even five minutes they’ll lose me as a customer. Well I say if you’re so frightened of that happening I truly wonder what are you hiding?

Second complaint. Ads that go on and on and on like an indeterminable diatribe. You know what I mean. The ones where you need to scroll down like it seems forever. I hear you. I can tell by your comments, claps you totally identify with me. Okay I can the seller wants to tell of what he or she considers benefits, reasons why to buy but geesh guys enough is enough already.

2nd. No contact support or poor contact support Who is running the site. If you can’t find out run as fast as you can from the web site. A legit site would readily give information on what person or persons is behind it. Run like the dickens and don’t ever go back to that webpage ever. A potential buyer should know who they are dealing with. That is an uncertain rule that I and most if not all decent folks believe in.

3rd. Biz ops that go on an indeterminable length. I’m sure you’ve seen webads that go on and on and on indeterminably. I understand they want to tell you as much as they can of how terrific their product or service is Its just its so darn long. Then if you’re patient enough they tell you the price. I don’t know about you but I get too impatient to constantly scroll down my scrolling bar for theAW XlliqwAFA who constantly test our patience. Well I hope I didn’t test your patience and you learned how not to write a business website.

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